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This Week with The Chicowitz: Technology Good; Technology Bad

[last week: "Threats to Freedom"]

Each week our Boomer-in-Charge, Hershel Chicowitz, has something to say about life, society, or what's going on... from the perspective of a baby boomer. This is what's on his mind the week of August 4:

One of my clients just outfitted me with a beeper: an electronic leash. Oh, the idea is OK; I guess I don't mind. This beeper has a "private time" feature. You can program it to refuse intrusions at certain hours of the day. That's good. But it also has a news feature. Every fifteen minutes or so, it transmits the latest news, weather, sports, and stock quotes to me. Now, I am as much of a news freak as anybody, but I don't need a beeper to tell me every time Barack Obama changes his position on an issue. Please! As much as I like technology, it often goes way too far. One obvious example in our past was 8-track tape players? Who in the world needed 8 tracks? What were they thinking? Chatty Cathy Technological marvels have been a staple of the boomer generation. Remember the doll that had life-like characteristics: Chatty Cathy. You pulled a string in her back, and Cathy talked. (Oh no; if you think I am going to comment on that particular feature, as my mother would say, you have another think coming!!) Today, Cathy has her own web site. Chatty Cathy: Probably a good idea. Chatty Cathy went to school Betsy Wetsy To compete against Chatty Cathy, Ideal Toys offered Betsy Wetsy. Remember the commercial: "Betsy Wetsy cries real tears. Of course, like all little babies, Betsy Wetsy wets and needs to be changed... and just think of all the fun you'll have giving Betsy Wetsy her bath." Folks, I couldn't make this stuff up if I tried! Today you can buy Betsy Wetsy in a christening outfit on the Internet for about $75. Think I'll pass on that one. Betsy Wetsy.... probably a bad idea. With that in mind, I've prepared a small list of recent innovations; I call it "technology good, technology bad." Steering-wheel lock: good idea. After some jamocca tried to steal the Mazdamobile a few years ago, I bought The Club. It is not perfect, but the thugs look for the easiest target. This is a good idea. Alarm-based automobile security system: bad idea. Nobody pays any attention to those things. Nobody! One of my neighbors has one; it goes off a couple times a month in the middle of the night... just to break the monotony. The last time it happened, another neighbor circulated a flyer offering a $500 reward to anyone who would steal this hunk of tin just so we could get a decent night's sleep! The alarm-based automobile security system is a bad, bad idea! Television: good idea. Cable television: bad idea. 240 channels of mostly garbage. It's like Sherwin Williams paint; it covers the earth... with trash. No offense, Sherwin-Williams... OK, I'm sure you make fine paint; I love your logo. Here's a free plug: Television remote control device: good idea. The VCR: good, very good idea. The blinking clock on the VCR: bad idea. Snooze button on the alarm clock: very good idea. Cordless telephone: very good idea; I like to be able to walk and talk. Cell phones: very bad idea. I do not like to walk that far... or talk that much. I know that there are times when a cell phone is very handy. But on the whole, it is a bad, bad idea. Absolutely nobody is that important. Trust me; much as you think you can't live without yours, time will prove me right on this one. The next time you're caught with your pants down around your ankles in a stall in a public bathroom trying to carry on a serious conversation, you'll begin to agree with me. Text messaging: Please! Absolutely ridiculous. Picture phone: bad, bad idea. AT&T pushed this for the better part of a decade. The absolute best thing about the telephone is that you can talk to someone at home without having to reveal that you are not wearing socks... or underwear. DNA testing: I was up in the air on this one, until the famous Blue Dress turned up. DNA testing: good idea! The Internet: good idea. The inventor of the Internet: bad idea. Police radar: bad idea. Radar detector: good idea. Automobile cruise control: heaven on earth! Microwave oven: terrific idea! Microwave popcorn: bad idea. Hair spray for men: good idea. Spray-on hair for men: bad idea. The Psychic Friends Network: bad idea. The Home Shopping Network: bad, bad idea. Fox Television Network: bad, bad, bad idea. Victoria's Secret: good idea... whatever the heck it is. The Bikini: good idea. The Bikini brief for men: bad idea. Henry Fonda: good idea. Jane Fonda: bad idea. Susan B. Anthony silver dollar coin: bad idea. Princess Sacawannajamuski silver dollar coin: they just won't learn, will they? Automatic teller machine: good idea. Automatic teller machine that plays movie trailers, commercials, and news stories: bad idea! Somebody needs to be shot for coming up with this one. Airport change machines that give you 85-cents in exchange for a dollar bill: criminal idea! Friends, this is another reason why the second amendment needs to be protected. DVR (Digital Video Recorder): good idea. DVR (Digital Video Recorder) that sends viewing data back to the provider: bad idea. Taking candid pictures of people with my digital camera: good idea. People taking candid pictures of me with their digital camera: bad idea. Disposable razor: good idea. Disposable camera: bad idea. Disposable diaper for babies: good idea. Disposable diaper for adults: bad idea. Fast food, drive-through window: good idea. Fast food, drive-through audio speaker: good idea, badly implemented. The electric toothbrush: bad idea; nobody should be that lazy. The electric nose clipper: ditto.

Personal Stories of the Chicowitz: Exploring My Roots: A Chicowitz History A Trip to the Dentist The Chicowitz Gets Dumped - Again! Just Shoot Me! He Sleeps with the Fishes My Little Girl, Princess Why am I Still Single? The Plastic Surgery Saga Our House is a Very, Very, Very Fine House... Not! Middle Age and the Mazdamobile Down for the Count That Dirty Dancing Me and You and a Dog Named Princess Contemplations on the Hereafter A Camping We Will Go Travels with Princess - Part 1 Tool Time with the Chicowitz The Chicowitz Goes Country ... and 120 other boomer stories Win prizes in the BBHQ Weekly Trivia Contest View answers to the daily trivia question Access 18 books in our Trivia Library Name that Tune Name that Tune - the 70s edition What's in a Number What's in a Number - the R&R edition The Name Game Who Said That? The Boomer Movie Quiz All of the above, plus: View lyrics to over 750 boomer-era songs Search 750 song lyrics for a word or phrase Search the title and artist of over 4,000 oldies Access the BBHQ School Registry Print the home page, 60s & 70s verbal collages All of the above, plus: Play 200 classic oldies from your computer. View the lyrics as the song plays Membership details here. Terrific boomer memorabilia!! Remember this? Click here to own a memory of Woodstock; $9.00 including shipping. "Old Friends Live on Stage (Deluxe Edition) (2 CD/1 DVD)," 55 songs: 2 CDs and a DVD from their 2003 concert tour. Click here to order this great collection.

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Hershel will have something else to say on August 11: mark your calendar to remind you to come back to BBHQ every Monday.

Personal Stories of the Chicowitz:     Exploring My Roots: A Chicowitz History     A Trip to the Dentist     The Chicowitz Gets Dumped - Again!     Just Shoot Me!     He Sleeps with the Fishes     My Little Girl, Princess     Why am I Still Single?     The Plastic Surgery Saga     Our House is a Very, Very, Very Fine House... Not!     Our House - Part 2     Our House - Part 3: Reclaiming the Past     Middle Age and the Mazdamobile     Down for the Count     That Dirty Dancing     Contemplations on the Hereafter     Tool Time with the Chicowitz     The Chicowitz Goes Country     Born to be Screwed     Mr. Brownthumb     The Mixer - A Singles Story     Crab Cakes Midlife Crisis:     The Defining Moment     The Saga Continues     Fighting Back     The Straight Scoop In December, Traditions of Christmas:     1997: The Christmas Tree     1998: Remembrance.... and Friends     1999: Christmas Cards     2001: Songs & Stories     2002: The Gift of Giving     2003: Decorating the Tree     2004: The Christmas Pin     2005: The Making of the Christmas Card     2006: Christmas on a Toothpick     2007: The Paper Route Years     Merry Christmas, Y'all     Hershel's Wish List: 2004     The "A" List Teach, Preach & Nag:     Courage and Class: Tony Snow     The New American Dream     A Grateful Heart     Things We'll Learn     The Death of a Friend     The Age of Non-Responsibility     "Thank You": Another Dying Phrase     The Saturday Night Live "Curse"     The Boomers, the Xers and Beyond     Rules, Boundaries and Consequences     It's for the Children     "American Beauty" - an American Nightmare     Of Values and Legacies     School Violence: Lessons from the Past     The Boomer Lyrics are with Us Everywhere     Everybody's Got a Story     Power to the Boomers     My Kingdom for a Plain Burger     Perception is Reality?     Oh Woe is Us!     It's Soooooo Hard     Take Care of Yourself     Public Service     The Universal Apology     The Leader of the Band Travels with Princess:     A Camping We Will Go     A Camping We Did Go     Travels with Princess - Part 1     Travels with Princess - Part 2     Me and You and a Dog Named Princess     Savannah: Midnight in the Garden     Time to Think     On Top of Old Smoky     The Fall Leaves and Such A View from Hurricane Alley:     The Big Scare     Before the Storm     After the Storm Katrina:     Intemperate Thoughts     Information Misload     Wet Dream Election 2004:     JF Kerry: Just the Facts     A Discussion of the Issues     The Election 2004 Quiz     Find a Bush Lie -- Collect $5,000     Talking Dirty in Washington     I Believe - The George W. Bush Edition     Inside John Kerry     Why Character Matters - Part Umpteen     Reporting for Duty     Is it Safe Yet?     Why We/They Hate Bush     Ronald Reagan: Hard-Wired Decency     What I Am     Nov. 8: Post-Mortem Election 2006:     I Believe -- the Election 2006 Edition     A Civil Debate

A Boomer Remembers...:     I Remember the 50s     The 60s: Life was Sweeter     The New American Dream     Another Side of the Greatest Generation     Where has all the Music Gone?     Memories of the Sock Hop     Remembering the Chairman of the Board     Restless in Seattle     The New Math     We Are Not One Boomer     "And Here's to You, Joe DiMaggio"     The Days of Summers Past     The Seeds of Character     A Letter to a Teacher     I Want a Clark Bar!     When Music was Fun     Decoration Day - The Measure of Sacrifice     11/22/63: We Remember     Flashback: The Y2K Hysteria     When the Music had Words     Ronald Reagan: Hard-Wired Decency     The Great Carsoni     Love Songs of the Chicowitz     Do You Remember These?     V-A-C-A-T-I-O-N -- We're on Vacation!     A Watergate Success Story Straight Talk on Social Issues:     Money 101: Incentive     Health Care: Solutions     Dr. Jack - A Man for Our Times     Misplaced Outrage: The Imus Affair     Global Warming Warning     Sin Offsets     Immigration: Good Fences     July, 2006: The Price of Freedom     Oh, Woe is Babs!     "Fair and Balanced"?     Lower Education     Boomer Retirement: "Hell No, We Won't Go!"     Social Security for Dummies     Feelings over Facts     Talking Down the Economy     The Little Red Hen     The Singles' Journal: Marriage     The Shadow IRS     The Dumbing Down of America     The Next, Great Entitlement     Voting Our way to Fairness     Straight Talk on Energy     We are Losing the Culture War     A Taxpayers' Bill of Rights     The Greedy Hand Extends its Reach     My Kingdom for a Candidate     Another Hat in the Toilet     We Have Met the Enemy     I'm From the Government & I'm Here to Help You     B. Clinton: The Case Against the President     B. Clinton: The Case For the President     Charlton Heston: The Culture War     Head Start: The Difference between Red and Blue     Labor Day - The Entrepreneur     It's Lonely at the Top     Kids on Drugs     Roe v. Wade Reality     Stem Cell 101     Vietnam: From a Distance     Iraq: Another Vietnam - ? Freedom:     What Makes America Great     Another Side of Freedom     The Purest form of Democracy     Threats to Freedom Mostly, Just Silly Stuff:     Sin Offsets     Menopause: Just for Laughs     The Fat Tax     Cell Phones & Other Crimes & Misdemeanors     Like Father, Like Son     Where Have You Gone, Walter Cronkite?     A Dire Warning to all Boomers     An Aging Boomer's Final Call to Action     BoomerSpeak     "American Pie": a Fresh Interpretation     Hail to Thee, My Alma Mater     Rock On!     The BBHQ Exam Story     Great Quotations     The $2.5 Million Pyramid     I Double-Dare You! The Terrorist Attack of 2001:     The Best of Times     Showing Your Patriotism     "All We are Saaaaaaaa-ying..."     2004: Is it Safe Yet? The Chicowitz on Iraq:     Politics for Dummies - Part I     Peace in Our Time     Yankee Go Home!     Bullhorn Responsibility     Blood for Oil!     Why We Fight     They Said - Part 1     They Said - Part 2     Why They're Wrong ** There's even more: The BBHQ Archives **

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The BBHQ Album of the Month is "Old Friends Live on Stage (Deluxe Edition) (2 CD/1 DVD)," by Simon & Garfunkel. If you were fortunate enough to see them in concert last year, I do not have to sell you. The concert was terrific! This album collection includes 55 songs, plus their new recording, "Citizen of the Planet," and one of the songs sung by the Everly Brothers during the concert. The DVD was recorded during their concert in Madison Square Garden in 2003. For any S&G fan, this is a must have! But then, you knew that already, didn't you?

The BBHQ Book of the Month is "Vinyl Highway," by Dee Dee Phelps. You remember her as Dee Dee, of Dick and Dee Dee. Together, they took a decade long ride on the rock and roll roller coaster. It was a heck of a ride! Dick Clark, Quincy Jones, the Beach Boys, Glenn Campbell, Dionne Warwick, Bobby Vinton... Dick and Dee Dee rubbed shoulders with all of them. This is her "behind the scenes" story. It's pretty cool.

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	Or, click the drop-down arrow and take your pick! The BBHQ Merchandise Mart Pictures, Posters & Autographs Alfalfa Muhammad Ali Woody Allen Beatles Jimmy Buffett Carol Burnett Eric Clapton Roy Clark Sean Connery Joe Cool Kirk Douglas Clint Eastwood Elvis Bob Feller W.C. Fields Harrison Ford the Godfather Andy Griffith Katherine Hepburn Dustin Hoffman the Honeymooners Bob Hope Martin Luther King Laurel & Hardy Life magazine Little Rascals Robert Mitchum Mickey Mouse Muppet Show Paul Newman Newman & Redford Jack Nicholson Peter, Paul & Mary Playboy logo Post, Time magazines The Lone Ranger Rat Pack Ronald Reagan The Riddler Rocky Mickey Rooney Simon & Garfunkel Spanky & Scotty Shirley Temple James Stewart - "Harvey" James Stewart - "It's a Wonderful Life" John Travolta John Wayne Woodstock